Friday, July 10, 2009

Open My Eyes

Teach me to see

I never dreamed would come a day
When I felt isolated from what I knew
What my daddy told me as a little girl
What I observed in silent halls
Through a meditative and holy moment

But along came struggle
Pain without hope of repair
The chambers of my heart rent from one another
Broken, bleeding and banished

And then the ways of the world
The loose lips sinking ships
And the wreckage washing up on the shore
And I drifted away, rough, ragged driftwood

The waves softened my edges and I began to hear Hosea
Come back to me with all your heart
Don't let fear keep us apart

Then I met him, he seemed like you
Humble, caring, loving and holy
He spoke Your name
And I loved him
I love him
I believe he loves You

But his ways are not my ways
His beliefs not the truth written on my heart
And his people hate my people
And I'm lost
How can I love you both
And show that love 
And live that love

And though my heart is breaking
Day in and day out
I will not feel alone
Instead, I give it all to You
I will not be stubborn with You
I will go, if you lead me
I will not harden my heart

All I ask of him is harden not his
To listen to You and go where you lead

If You lead us apart, it will be a torment
Like one heart ripped in two
But if You tell it to beat, it will beat
If You tell it to live, it will live

If You lead us together, give us the strength
To choose what is right
To do Your will, not our upbringing
To truly and finally become one

We're still halfway through the marriage moment
Though we've said our vows
What remains is for our hearts to be sealed
By Your truth and hand

I have not prayed in so long
I have felt like an abandoned daughter
Hard as I tried, I couldn't find You there
I did find good people and honest
I did find good will and good intentions
But You were hidden from me there

Now I pray and beg to feel You again
I give all over to You and pray for your guidance
For your vocation
For your hand in my life
Like a little girl who skinned her knee
I need my Father to heal me and set things right

And I pray that you preserve my covenant
It was made in love and honesty
The love that rejects self
Only, in rejecting self, for a moment
I rejected the home we have known together
All the days of my life
Help me to find a way to love him and You
I pray in Jesus' name, Amen

Open my Eyes Lord,
Teach me to see...

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